Thursday, May 15, 2008

'Bout It 'Bout It.

So I've decided that for specific details about me, I'll give you these lists, because if there's one thing I definitely am, it's a person who makes lists. Sometimes.

Based on personal experience, stupid shit I've done, and repeated failure, I am none of the following:

ballerina
basketball player
Lego architect
professional fencer
veterinarian
jockey
disc jockey (radio)
disc jockey (wedding)
potter
painter
butcher
baker
candlestick-maker
zookeeper
dog-groomer
pizza deliverer
sober
softballer
swimmer
film developer
carpenter
back-up singer
pianist
drummer
healthy
wealthy
wise
satisfied
punctual
willowy
frail
slim
athletic
bowler
elementary school teacher
waitress
tooth-flosser
bartender
ambitious
good listener
soft-spoken
stingy
sexy
sympathetic
karaoke superstar
movie critic
arachnophobic

Or, I guess you could say I was all of those things at one time or another. Not concurrently. But I tried all of them, was awful at most of them, and loved some of them.

I guess I can say I am these (subject to change and additions):


road tripper
drunk
life ruiner
candid
Champion
dog walker
letter writer
wanderer
late all the time
movie addict
sleeper
garlicky
aimless
imitator
instigator
guilty


...

5 comments:

Unknown said...

Dude, I didn't know you co-wrote the school play in 8th grade. They wouldn't even let me be a numbered theif in Arabian Nights. I was a stage hand. Which I think involved making out w/ someone backstage in the dark. I don't really remember. But I'd like to think that's what it involved.

Rassles said...

I would rather be able to say that I made out with someone backstage than wrote a scene about Theseus the Hairdresser giving Medusa a savvy styling.

Rassles said...

I should totally steal the tape from my parents...and we can watch me as a Greek muse in braces and a toga. Oh, and you can hear the song we wrote to "Calendar Girls." It's all, "I love I love my Mount Olympian Girls, sweeeeeeet Olympian girls, especially those stories you tell..."

Unknown said...

That song is now stuck in my head. I hate you.

And I mispelled thief in my earlier post. I'm so ashamed.

Laura said...

Your about me section is fantastic. I love your "things you're not" list.