Friday, June 5, 2009

This Conversation Lasted About Five Minutes

Sean: Okay, Alien/Predator films from best to worst go
Predator, Aliens, Alien, AVP2, Predator 2, AVP1, Alien 3, Alien 4

Me: No fucking way
Alien, Aliens, Predator, AVP1, Alien 4, Predator 2, Alien 3
haven't seen AVP2

Sean: no way
dude they just keep getting better
seriously?

Me: Alien is totally better than Predator

Sean: you're outta your goddamn mind

Me: I am devoted to Ripley

Sean: me too, but what about Arnold?

Me: dude, you are obsessed.

Sean: you have to love Arnold as Dutch.

Me: Arnold is so your boyfriend

Sean: it is rather unhealthy
"This thing is hunting us. ALL OF US. You know that?"

Me: I'M GONNA CUT YOUR NAME RIGHT INTO HIM

Sean: awesome
Dave rented the AVP's yesterday and I watched them twice.
You seriously need to see 2

Me: I'm working on it, you have to be patient.
you think I watched it since you messaged me fucking ten seconds ago or something?

Sean: Have you ever considered the timeline ramifications of the AVP series? Because in order it doesn't make sense

Me: You'd think by the year of Alien, the alien would be a legend.

Sean: Exactly. Everyone would have heard of their battle.

Me: You know what this means?

Sean: Totally illogical
what?

Me: Dragons are real.

Sean: Duh, I could have told you that

Me: They are going to start crawling out of the earth and reign destruction...

Sean: Where is Matthew McConaughey when you need to fight fire with fire?

Me: And we'll never see it coming.
Stupid dragons

Sean: You're a dork

Me: Whatever, you totally knew exactly what I was talking about.
I need to get back to work.

Sean: That's okay I gotta go
Time to make the beer

Me: You know, you do kind of remind me of the Time To Make The Donuts Guy.

Sean: Well I don't really make the beer
more like transport it from one side of the warehouse to the other

Me: So you're like the Jason Statham of beer.

Sean: That's funny

Me: Duh. Have you met me? I'm hi-larious.

Sean: Late

Me: Peace out

...

I seriously love/hate the fact that people can instant message me on Facebook.

...

21 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'd like to meet the Jason Statham of beer

The Ambiguous Blob said...

I love the badness of AVP and AVP2. I paid full price at the theater to see both. Yeah!

Anonymous said...

your order is correct: Alien, Aliens, AVP... after that, who cares...

FB Messaging is ok if it's someone you want to chat with. it's SO NOT OK if it's the creepy hunchbacked dude from high school who played saxaphone and is now teaching computer classes at a community college and he wants to know more about your work and aaaaaargh.

next time i should see how he feels about dinosaurs...

Anonymous said...

I saw a couple of dragons earlier today.

Chris said...

I totally agree with your ordering. And I also have not seen AVP2. Didn't feel the need.

renalfailure said...

Aliens, Predator, Alien... and then who cares about the rest. (though I agree with Sean about Alien 4 being last just because Joss Whedon wrote it)

Alien is great, but it doesn't have Jesse Ventura with a chain gun. And Predator doesn't have Bill Paxton going "That's it, man. Game over, man! Game over!"

Ellie said...

I'm kinda partial to ET.

Anonymous said...

A while back (several years, probably) I sat down and watched all the Alien movies back to back to back . . . etc. My fave? The one directed by Fincher. Not sure which one that is, however . . .

You're on Facebook?! Look me up! I have a link to my profile on my blog . . .

(An aside: my word verification for today is "countr" How hard would it be for them to at least finish?!)

Schmee said...

Dragons are REAL!!!

Gwen said...

I have a love/hate relationship with the IM thingie on Facebook. On the one hand it's a cool distraction at work. On the other hand it's a cool distraction at work. So it's great because I hate my job. But it sucks because it keeps me from doing my job. I have a confession: I have never seen a single Alien or Predator movie. Does that make a total weirdo? I mean even more of a total weirdo? Oh and I would LOVE to have cool IM conversations with you on Facebook. (Friend me! Gwen Binder Jackson).

Blues said...

Man, I'm so jealous of people that get to do this kinda stuff on work time, like I used to. At my work, they monitor our internet usage and provide reports on it for our bosses. What's worse, for my job, I don't even need a computer barely, only to use online dictionaries and look stuff up on google a few times a day. Which means that even if I only read blogs and get on facebook a few times a day, it's gonna appear as the pages that are most frequently visited. Fucking assholes making me work while I'm at work. Don't they know I need to mess around a certain percentage of work time to be a happy employee?

Le Meems said...

I have never seen any of these movies. what is wrong with me. I like beer, tho...

Gypsy said...

Jason Statham and beer? Perfect couple. In my pants. Wait, what?

Red said...

I have never seen any of those movies, but I love that you tagged this post "shibboleth".

I _did_ however, see _Leatherheads_ this weekend. I do love George Clooney. And he wrote and directed this one in addition to starring in it. That man is even more talented than he is handsome.

Soon, very soon, I will finally see _Teen Wolf_. Probably also _Teen Wolf, Too_ because Netflix says they come together.

Love Bites said...

I don't like it that people can now message me when I sign in to view my yahoo e-mail. I may have to get a new e-mail account just for that reason.

This very annoying guy that I used to think was totally hot when we were having sex 4 years ago always messages me. Meh.

Mia Watts said...

Haven't seen AVP yet. Love the Aliens, Pred one so much better than P2. Ripley rocks. Arnie is a joke.

M. said...

i know exactly what you mean.

M. said...

by the facebook love hate thing, i mean.

Anonymous said...

Alien beats Predator like scissors beats paper.

And Schmee is right: dragons *are* real.

Rassles said...

Nurse: If you're willing to move to Alaska, then get on up there, because he ain't never leaving.

Tabbie: You need to make up your mind about your identity. Should I just call you Tabbie? I think I will. And: excellent.

Daisy: He better feel good about them, because dinosaurs are. the. shit.

Franklin: You lucky bitch. I hate not seeing dragons.

Chris: I'm getting on that like flies on fruit. I mean, watching AVP2. So I can make educated decisions regarding the A/P dynasty.

RF: See, I like Resurrection better because Joss Whedon wrote it. I'm a sucker, I know.

Ellie: Well, what sane person isn't?

Brian: Alien 3? Really? That's crazy talk. Then again, I also love Ridley Scott, which is probably why I like Alien best, anyway. Speaking of Ridley Scott, if he fucks up that new Robin Hood movie? I'm leaving him for PTA.

Schmee: Yeah, buddy.

Gwen: Goddammit, I'm sticking to my guns on this one. I'm sorry, Gwen. I can't friend you. Please don't take it personally. I will not friend anyone out of principle. This does not diminish our love, does it?

Blues: Exactly. Fucking around on the internet cures employment ennui.

Meems: You don't like alien monster movies? For shame, friend. For shame.

Gypsy: Beer pants. I have worn them. Quite often, actually. I wish I wore Jason Statham.

Red: This year really is the best year to watch Teen Wolf. Being the Year of Teen Wolf. And all that.

Rassles said...

LB: I've never had sex with Sean, and I don't ever really want to, so I'm lucky here. Plus he lives in Anchorage, and what better way to talk to him than messaging? Tim zones get in the way.

Mia: If you go into AVP expecting fun and horseshit, then you'll love it. Maybe.

Mae: Ambivalence is a bitch, no?

Gully: Oh, I love it when people agree with that.