Friday, June 4, 2010

Maybe I incepted Inception into Christopher Nolan whilst HE slept.

You guys, I'm sure, have seen trailers for Inception.

Well, fuck. There goes my book. I have to change it. Again. Dreaming is going to be the new It Overused Plot Device. Like time-travelling zombie vampires with only short-term memories with a multiple-personality twist at the end (oh, Jesus, I hope not. I hope people take this movie and let it stand alone and DON'T FUCKING WITH THE DREAMING.) because I mean, seriously? You know how long it takes to try to write a book, and create and imagine new devices from goddamn scratch?

(I am not going to talk about it, by the way. The book. Any questions you ask will be graciously ignored. I didn't tell anyone I was even working on one because I don't want to be fucking pestered all the time. "How's your book? What's it about? Am I in it? How much have you written? Can I read some of it? When do you think you'll finish it? How does it start?" All that shit does is stress me out.)

You know how long it takes? A long time. That's how long. I am such a fucking idiot. I am way too insecure. No way am I going to be accused of copying anything, whether I did it or not. Must start over again. Luckily I can keep the same characters, but gee willikers. I have issues.

Obviously, I know, there have been stories about dreams for years. Centuries even. It's nothing new. But you know how lately pop culture takes one successful plot device and just goes fucking bonkers with it, hammering out like forty movies in two years with the exact same plot until it becomes spoofed in a Wayans brothers movie? And then you're like, "Seriously? Another movie about dreams? Fuck you, Hollywood."

I am stronger than my issues. Right? I am stronger than dreams. Keep on telling yourself that, me.

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I leave for Ireland tomorrow. Everyone have a brilliant week. Go Hawks.

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14 comments:

Here In Franklin said...

Ireland. Yum. Guiness and smoked salmon. If you're going to the Dingle Peninsula, take the back road over the mountains, not the sissy one by the sea. Ask the lady in the sweater shop in Tralee--she'll tell you.

Chris said...

Hey, bummer about the book. Maybe don't burn the old version just yet, strictly based on movie trailers. Have fun in Ireland. Don't forget to look the other way when you cross the street.

Anonymous said...

have fun! don't fall for any irishmen... they'll stomp all over your heart. maybe it's a jig. hurts like a motherfucker...

renalfailure said...

It's taken me three years even get in sight of finishing the second draft of my book. That's the draft you show people, not the first draft. First draft is balls. The second draft brings the real fear, handing that draft off to a trusted friend to read and comment on, hoping they won't tell you that you wasted all that time sucking.

And this is the best Stanley Cup Finals in years. Go Flyers!

JMH said...

How's your book? What's it about? Am I in it? How much have you written? Can I read some of it?

Go Hawks. Safe trip.

Chamuca said...

Most of the time, that's why I don't tell people I even have a blog, because they will ask if they're in it.

What am I supposed to say? "No, because you're fucking boring."

I think it's cool you're writing a book though. Good for you.

Ellie said...

All you need to do is Irish up the book. Then you'll get a movie deal. It'll be one of the 40 in the next 2 years.

Hope you're having fun.

Mimi Cake said...

Please, Please, Please wash clothes in a river using a washboard like Nicole Kidman did in Far and Away.

But you are AMERICAN doing it in IRELAND so it's reverse and awesome. And maybe your very own TOM CRUISE who isn't short, a scientologist or have a complex, or a penchance for bangs will materialize and SHOW YOU how washing clothes in a river is REALLY DONE.

I exhausted my caps lock and my imagination.
enjoy.

MoLinder said...

so, here's your new book idea - you should write about me. cuz i'm fucking awesome. boom. yummy.
you're welcome!
hope you are having good, wholesome, family time in ireland. you are a dumb whore by the way because you're there.
oh yeah, get me a present.

Sid said...

Geez you've been quiet for so long I'd assumed you left for Ireland already.

Anyway, I've started writing a book. And by started I mean the blank pages of my journal (I'm old school) are mocking. All I've done so far is tell people I want to write a book.

The Ambiguous Blob said...

I haven't heard of that movie. I haven't seen a movie for weeks. The last one was Oceans in 3D. I fell asleep near the end and missed out on some penguins... I assume.

By the time you complete your writing, find a publisher, edit edit edit, the dreams plot won't be all the rage anymore. Don't sweat it.

Del-V said...

I hate when people copy your ideas. That's why I only write erotic Star Trek fan-fiction.

Anonymous said...

You had me at Gee willikers.

Mahjong said...

I was looking for something different on Google, but ended here, reading your blog post, good read, thanks.