So I'm sorry, to all ten of you, that I have yet to continue my story.
Time is a factor, and starting tonight I have five-day-wedding-extravaganza, so you know. Fun. Just think about how long you had to wait in between Harry Potter novels, or seasons of LOST. Yeah. I just put shit into perspective.
Until...later. Eventually. Man, remember when I would line up guests posts and shit? Remember when I actually wrote things of substance? Yeah, me neither. Excuses are useless, like Folgers coffee and things cooked without butter. And movies starring Ashley Judd and amateur philatelists and calculators with sticky buttons. Dry erase markers. Old calendars.
So I have a calendar on the the wall of my office and on my wall at home, and both are permanently fixed on 2008. People always point at it like, "Um, it's August now." and then I'll say, "Actually it's September, and that calendar is from 2008. June is always the best picture."
And CrazyLiz moved in and tried to make all the clocks the same time, but luckily I keep on unplugging the microwave and the coffeepot so those clocks are just constantly bonked.
Take that, time.
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9 comments:
dry erase markers are ESSENTIAL for meeting survival. i can sniff 4 at a time and catch a transient buzz that keeps me from killing someone stupid.
My blog was last updated in June, and that was just a drawing rather than a post of any substance. My theory on blogs: 1. I have a life. While I love reading comments on my blog, I blog because I enjoy it, and the second I start feeling obligated it stops being fun, so screw it, I'll post when I get around to it. 2. Readers who are put off by an irratic posting schedule should figure out that it's 2010 and learn to use an RSS reader already.
I love seeing time get a taste of his own medicine: Bonking. Time always bonks me.
I should do guest bloggers some time, maybe have people write odes to their favorite Renal Failure Player, though that would probably mean five straight posts about Tag Larkin.
The digital clocks in my house are set to the correct (if you believe that shit) time. The ones with hands, there are three, are all set to 11:59 P.M. (or A.M., if you were inclined to view it that way.) Like on the cusp of something very important. That's how I like to feel.
Erm yeah, I lost interest in Lost after season 2. Also lost interest in Prison Break. Plotlines were just too convoluted AND over the top. Yeah, I said it.
You know what's awesome? Using washable crayons to leave yourself messages on your wall. It's not awesome that it takes a lot of arm power to wash it off later, but still... lost in awesome.
I'm telling you this, because if you draw a calendar on your wall and don't change it forever, you can chalk it up to sore arms or some shit.
I have a calendar in what we euphemistically call "the game room" from 2003. But one in the office would be better. Enjoy wedding-paluzza.
I knew I couldn't handle having a clock in my home. It stopped and then I just let it stay there frozen, no matter how much it irritates me to not know what time it is. I'm like Kramer though, i can guess within the hour. The good news is that I don't have a strict time of when i need to be to work, so if I show up more or less in the morning nobody seems to notice.
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